Hey look a mirror


I’ve realized that a lot of what I write on here has been about the well less than optimistic side of me. I’m not sure if this is due to a necessary separation but somehow I should find a way to separate it. Perhaps this is the place where I write down discoveries I’ve waited for and once originally drawn up they were put in a negative light and it simply carries through.

 

So it’s been more than two years since I’ve been on a date with someone I seriously considered to be boyfriend material. The more I think about it the more it makes me wonder why, I’m really nice in person, compared to what I nag about on here.

 

I quit my job in HR, for me this was a huge step, I had studied 4-5 years to get into an HR role. I got there and wanted everything but it. To walk away was hard, this was my dream, this was a job working towards my professional certification. None of it meant anything to me, I loved what I did in school but it just didn’t translate to work. I had thought about this while studying HR, I neglected to listen to anything that would sway my focus.

 

This month has been above average for me. The biggest security event happened this month and I worked far more than I ever have, which was my goal going in.

 

Medical 1: There were a couple of scares though, I had been in the same area as someone who had MRSA (I only remember the name of this because it is MRS-A). This fun contagious disease I could have got through that security event causes basically zits with black dots in the centre and they are way more painful than the regular, and contagious. I had to go through a full decontamination (non-contact debrief followed by showering, however I prefer to tell people it was isolation, haha).

 

Medical 2: I discovered three yellow spots on my legs, two on my left leg and one on my right. This made me immediately think liver-related issue. So I went through a blood and urine test and found nothing then went back for an ultrasound (12 hour fasting is surprisingly easy) which so far has found nothing, follow up appointment coming soon yet not expecting anything. The specialist basically said I was a skinny white boy and he couldn’t find anything wrong lol. I’m still concerned though, how is your skin turning yellow just a thing, it’s messed up.

 

While working security for a recent event I did 11 ½ hours of pat downs, which by being a dude made me only able to pat down other dudes. It’s kind of invasive and yup there’s a lot of touching and some awkward situations. The day afterward my body didn’t hesitate to tell me I was in pain all over but it was worth it lol. Hey, the shift went by pretty quick, about twenty people were doing pat downs and the lineup still took 2 hours, yikes.

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